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Things would be so much easier if I could get married in a church. I asked my fiancee if I was being too anal about not wanting to get married in a church, and he said, "Well . . . we are pagans, after all." It makes everything more complicated.

It's a funny thing, defining myself as pagan. If you just ask me about my personal beliefs, you find something suspiciously close to unitarian universalism. My attitudes toward Deity are awfully non-discriminatory. But if you ask me what I revere . . . I revere the earth. If I worship, I want earth beneath me and sky above. I express respect for that awesome force I'd call Deity by respecting the world around me.

Which is still kind of vague.

Ultimately, though, I think I define myself by my small Powers. My guides and guardians. Not so much the things I believe in as the interface through which I interact with them. My view of the universe is animistic. How can it be anything else when the world insists on talking back and occasionally biting me on the ass?

And then there's that whole "remembering things that never happened to me" thing.

Yeah, I guess that's pagan, after all.

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alynnwells

January 2011

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